Oxygenation

(WARNING: this is lengthy)

            I can’t believe I shot out three posts last week.  My boss is still away and it’s still too cold outside for lunch break walks (bbrrrrr!), so I’m here at my desk typing away, over Sundried tomato and Basil Wheat Thins and a cup of black coffee.  I’ll be taking coffee off my life for 40 days again starting on Ash Wednesday, so I guess that explains why I’m trying my darnest to hoard up as much caffeine as I can into my already poor system (can’t help it!).

        Saturday allowed me some pretty good respite from it all.  Hubby and I hang out with his buddies from work, a couple with a baby.  The wife (Cherl) and I were booked for some pampering at the spa courtesy of our husbands.  Hubby and his buddy went to the mall with the baby (Cherl and I were sure they looked like a gay couple with a baby…it’s kind of funny thinking about it, not that there is anything wrong with it, it’s really cute). I had an oxygenated facial with ultrasonic dermabrasion (oh mother of all skin pampering!!!) and a good massage which really helped my backaches a lot.  The masseuse noted that I do have a collection of “crunchies” in my muscles, meaning I’m either stressed, or I don’t move a lot…OR BOTH. 

        On the drive to the spa and back, Cherl and I talked about life in general.  I found myself thanking her for letting me join her self-pampering day.  She also thanked me for coming over.  Then I realized, as I was saying it, I don’t really get to hang out with girl friends a lot anymore.  First of all, I haven’t really made that many in my two years here.  Not that friendship has been scarce; I do have my sister, my cousins, and a handful of old friends that I see regularly, and who I’m really fond of.  But I do miss having my own branch of friends who are neither blood-related nor “work”-related. Or simply put, the kind of people who share the exact same interests with you, won’t personally know some people you might find yourself in one way or another bitching about, won’t suck the energy out of you, or those who will simply let you be yourself, without expectations.  I’m usually slow to warm up because trust is a very sacred thing to me. I know in my heart that I can be fully trusted so I end up yearning for the same.  That’s why, I’m usually picky, or sometimes reserved.  I usually clam up when commitment is concerned, I know I do have a lot of growing up to do still.  But once I award the term “friend”, I always, at no cost, give my very best. I think that’s why I don’t spread myself too thinly.  I’m after quality.  But then of course, there is this huge hunger which surfaces now once in a while. And it doesn’t mean I’m demoting my old best friends into the backseat either. Occasionally, I just find myself craving for more.

Eversince I got married and moved here to California, I gravitated toward my husband’s friends for new acquaintances, my extended family and his.  Is this the usual thing that happens to a married person, where you inherit your spouse’s friends, or your spouse’s friend’s spouses; and he inherits yours? I have my favorite buddies (friends-in-the making?) at work and at hula class.  Does that sound promising enough?

My bestie at this point is my husband, who’s really everything that a friend can ever be.  He’s my support and buddy 24/7.  And oh how he can also talk about purses, jewelry, other people, 600-count Egyptian cotton sheets, Calphalon pans, shopping, clothes and shoes with me.  I’m lucky to be married to that kind of person.  Our world (his and mine) is an impenetrable paradise of its own. Isn’t that really how it’s supposed to be?

A lot of people end up making new friendships in times of misery and adversity…exactly when one needs a shoulder to cry on.  I’m pretty happy and content with my life and marriage right now, and hopefully not due for any kind of sorrow down the road.  I am, at this point, with no immediate need to raise “a glassful of tears” toast with anyone.  I can’t offer any melodramatic ice-breaker to entice potential takers. I am not a whiner either, but I can be a very good listener and shrink (hahaha).  I could certainly use a “stranger” for me to grow into or who could grow into me.

...Someone who would like to breathe in some light femme moments with me, even just for a rejuvenating oxygenated facial at the spa.