Last snowboarding weekend
SUGAR BOWL
North Tahoe, CA
April 21, 2007
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Sh*tty Day
My international license is expiring on April 23 (yes, I am still driving with it...DMV acknowledged it and extended it when I perfected my written test). But crazy chicken nugget! I FAILED my behind-the-wheel test yesterday because I "drifted" to the left lane without looking over my shoulder. The examiner said I wasn't looking over my shoulder good enough. Alright, I don't want to go through the horrible details. I may not be the best driver in the world, but I have been doing it for years. But yeah, my bad. It's the bad driving habits I brought here from Philippines...finally getting me in trouble... You, EDSA traffic, you!!!
There we go, announcing it to the whole world! I'm not embarassed. I actually think it's funny. It was disappointing though. But well, there's always a next time. I'm sure I'll do better on that next one (but I know myself, sometimes, I can get very nervous deep down inside but I'm as calm as the sunset...and you can't really tell because my soul just short of flies away from the situation, just like that)...I guess that explains why the examiner said I "drifted". And I...for the life of me, can't remember how it happened until now. Drifted. Perfect word for me. I always drift away. My friends tell me I need some "touch therapy". Take it literally...TOUCH ME = So I zoom back to the moment. LOL.
Well, speaking of therapy. After work, I went to this craft store called Beverly's to buy some easy cross stitch patterns. Just a little bit of something to shake it all off my system. I got me hooked back into it now. I'll show you my work next time.
Then I cooked afritada for dinner, which my hubby says is a winner, next to my kare-kare. Or my adobo that is totally off the hook.
I'm drifting...
Driving for me is easy. But I wish the test per se is as easy as cooking. Or as relaxed as cross-stitching. Or that any of those will help me get a license fast. Suddenly, I missed Philippines. You can even get a license in absencia...is that good or what. *SIGH*
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
One Hundred Thoughts
100 posts. 100 blogs. 100 entries since I hopped unto this craze on November 2005. On the funny side, I have proven to myself that I possess a certain degree of verbal diarrhea. On a more serious note, I am happy to have chronicled the highs and lows and all the Funny-or-senseless-Hilarious-or-poignant-Sometimes-occasionally-sinister-well-I'm-only-human-or-The-Ridiculously-mundane-or-Clearly-insightful-In-betweens of MY LIFE. This has been "me" for the past year and a half. Perhaps, not all of me, but at least snippets of me. Like giant icebergs, there is still so much underneath the vast ocean that has been left unsaid. Perhaps waiting to surface in the future. A window to peek into my heart, nonetheless.
I'm celebrating it all today on my one hundredth blog...the past one and a half years of my life...coming back to me one recollection at a time, like snapshots taken from a moving train.
All I can say is, I want to give myself a pat on the back. I'm not sure if I have done a good job or not (how can one tell anyway? what's the official criteria for doing a good job in your life, in a no-two-lives-are-alike world? ) but all I know is, I still want to give myself this pat on the back. So many things have happened to me in a span of one year and a half. In March last year, I went to Rome, Italy on this grand family trip. I saw the Pope three times! It was a great travel experience with my family and relatives, and shall I say, a second honeymoon with Aldred. July, I migrated to USA, left my dear parents, family and most of my treasured friends behind. I've finally started a life with my husband, went through a very difficult pregnancy and nevertheless rejoiced about it, lost the baby delivered stillborn at 21 weeks in November anyway, wept and grieved and tried to move on --this left my heart a scar, no, the wound is still a little fresh. (They say you grow up more when you are able to take care of different things for a child, like coordinate for a christening or a birthday party --just imagine how far this took me when just after I delivered, my husband and I had to prepare for a cremation and a memorial service!)...Then I tried to immense myself into the new routine that living here in the US requires...mostly being on my own to accomplish even the most minute of tasks, driving around (no driver to chauffeur me around when I need to pick up something from a store -- I miss you, Mang Romy!!!), getting lost (the GPS navigator is now my best buddy of them all), and following a barrage of new rules while bending the old habits (I didn't say bad) that thirty-three years of living in the Philippines has formed. I willingly adjusted to other standards as well, such as in social functions, events and seasons, and readily braved the cold winter nights (and mornings). I embarked into an ardous jobhunt, finding out that all my years of achieving and excelling in the past don't really count in some instances because a US job experience tucked under my belt, no matter how small, is what some people fish for. I found a job anyway (not exactly the teaching job I was hoping for --- yes, I still see and hear little kids giggling in my sleep), but this corporate desk job actually pays more and I enjoy it just the same. I am so lucky that Fred (the President) decided to trust me and the skills and experience I only blabbered about in the interview, short of plucking them all out from thin air, except that I was actually telling the truth. But they have no immediate way of proving that. I just have to prove myself now. I'm the only Filipino in my department, and in a job that capitalizes on good oral and written communication skills. I know I speak English well. But it is not my mother tongue. I still have slips. Lots of it. And so I try to watch my back. Some days, all things in general are just hard. But most days now, things are getting better and better.
I'm proud that I have cruised through. I am still in one piece. But wait, what am I so proud of? My life may be nothing compared to other people's tearjerker sagas that inspire drama soap operas. Or maybe I am just really blessed with some degree of resiliency. I don't get affected right away. Not enough tears at times. I'm not even that homesick yet. Plus, in crucial sink or swim encounters, I am not scared to dive right into it. So I just do. I'm a good warrior, I guess. Most days, I’m quite a tough cookie. Some days though, I feel like a duck floating serenely on the water. It looks so calm yet the feet are paddling wildly underneath. I just soldier on.
All the water in the world could never shink a ship unless it gets inside.
This is what I'm really proud of. This optimism about life in general. Just rolling along with the wave, adjusting my sails to the wind, and most importantly, believing like a little child that there will always ALWAYS be a silver lining behind every cloud. And that no situation really ever lasts forever. Each day always bears new surprises. That's what makes the world turn, that's what makes our life story worth reading, from one page to the next. And so I always hang on. I always live everyday with this faith. Til the next hill, or the next valley.
Life is good. Just appreciate the beauty of each small thing every minute. Or each big thing that comes your way. I have always thought of myself as having a mature outlook. But looking back to the past year or so, I feel I have grown a lot more still. No, I didn't get older. Just smarter, stronger and perhaps, a lot wiser. More mature in coping especially in times of adversity. But perhaps a lot more younger even, and as childlike as can be in enjoying every wonderful moment that comes.
No one ever really stops growing up. And...
One can really keep growing up, and get younger at the same time too.
The other day, I came home to find mallard ducks lounging on the front yard. Aldred and I fed them together until the sun went down. Yesterday, he bought me a remote control helicopter that actually flies! We spent all night flying it around in the bedroom. I'm happy with how life has been treating me. And how I am treating life.
Your life, almost always, is what you give back to it.
God has been so good (Thank you, Lord!) I know there's still a lot more changes in the future. Kids, finances, a new house? (and mortgage to think about), coordinating household schedules, chores, health.
But right now, I'm having fun at work. I was able to stick around in spirit (via telephone lines) until my mom has gotten another clean bill of health. I can put up with the "unpopular personalities" around that some people warned me about, without a shudder. I am doing well in this whole wifey thing to my spouse. And hopefully to this whole mommy thing to my stepdaughter (who is with us on holidays and school breaks). I drink wine, laugh and hang out with my stepdaughter's mom, which I actually enjoy. I can drive around now without cops scaring the *beep* out of me. Most of all, I gave birth to an angel son who is now watching over me.
So, pat on the back it is...
I'm celebrating it all today on my one hundredth blog...the past one and a half years of my life...coming back to me one recollection at a time, like snapshots taken from a moving train.
All I can say is, I want to give myself a pat on the back. I'm not sure if I have done a good job or not (how can one tell anyway? what's the official criteria for doing a good job in your life, in a no-two-lives-are-alike world? ) but all I know is, I still want to give myself this pat on the back. So many things have happened to me in a span of one year and a half. In March last year, I went to Rome, Italy on this grand family trip. I saw the Pope three times! It was a great travel experience with my family and relatives, and shall I say, a second honeymoon with Aldred. July, I migrated to USA, left my dear parents, family and most of my treasured friends behind. I've finally started a life with my husband, went through a very difficult pregnancy and nevertheless rejoiced about it, lost the baby delivered stillborn at 21 weeks in November anyway, wept and grieved and tried to move on --this left my heart a scar, no, the wound is still a little fresh. (They say you grow up more when you are able to take care of different things for a child, like coordinate for a christening or a birthday party --just imagine how far this took me when just after I delivered, my husband and I had to prepare for a cremation and a memorial service!)...Then I tried to immense myself into the new routine that living here in the US requires...mostly being on my own to accomplish even the most minute of tasks, driving around (no driver to chauffeur me around when I need to pick up something from a store -- I miss you, Mang Romy!!!), getting lost (the GPS navigator is now my best buddy of them all), and following a barrage of new rules while bending the old habits (I didn't say bad) that thirty-three years of living in the Philippines has formed. I willingly adjusted to other standards as well, such as in social functions, events and seasons, and readily braved the cold winter nights (and mornings). I embarked into an ardous jobhunt, finding out that all my years of achieving and excelling in the past don't really count in some instances because a US job experience tucked under my belt, no matter how small, is what some people fish for. I found a job anyway (not exactly the teaching job I was hoping for --- yes, I still see and hear little kids giggling in my sleep), but this corporate desk job actually pays more and I enjoy it just the same. I am so lucky that Fred (the President) decided to trust me and the skills and experience I only blabbered about in the interview, short of plucking them all out from thin air, except that I was actually telling the truth. But they have no immediate way of proving that. I just have to prove myself now. I'm the only Filipino in my department, and in a job that capitalizes on good oral and written communication skills. I know I speak English well. But it is not my mother tongue. I still have slips. Lots of it. And so I try to watch my back. Some days, all things in general are just hard. But most days now, things are getting better and better.
I'm proud that I have cruised through. I am still in one piece. But wait, what am I so proud of? My life may be nothing compared to other people's tearjerker sagas that inspire drama soap operas. Or maybe I am just really blessed with some degree of resiliency. I don't get affected right away. Not enough tears at times. I'm not even that homesick yet. Plus, in crucial sink or swim encounters, I am not scared to dive right into it. So I just do. I'm a good warrior, I guess. Most days, I’m quite a tough cookie. Some days though, I feel like a duck floating serenely on the water. It looks so calm yet the feet are paddling wildly underneath. I just soldier on.
All the water in the world could never shink a ship unless it gets inside.
This is what I'm really proud of. This optimism about life in general. Just rolling along with the wave, adjusting my sails to the wind, and most importantly, believing like a little child that there will always ALWAYS be a silver lining behind every cloud. And that no situation really ever lasts forever. Each day always bears new surprises. That's what makes the world turn, that's what makes our life story worth reading, from one page to the next. And so I always hang on. I always live everyday with this faith. Til the next hill, or the next valley.
Life is good. Just appreciate the beauty of each small thing every minute. Or each big thing that comes your way. I have always thought of myself as having a mature outlook. But looking back to the past year or so, I feel I have grown a lot more still. No, I didn't get older. Just smarter, stronger and perhaps, a lot wiser. More mature in coping especially in times of adversity. But perhaps a lot more younger even, and as childlike as can be in enjoying every wonderful moment that comes.
No one ever really stops growing up. And...
One can really keep growing up, and get younger at the same time too.
The other day, I came home to find mallard ducks lounging on the front yard. Aldred and I fed them together until the sun went down. Yesterday, he bought me a remote control helicopter that actually flies! We spent all night flying it around in the bedroom. I'm happy with how life has been treating me. And how I am treating life.
Your life, almost always, is what you give back to it.
God has been so good (Thank you, Lord!) I know there's still a lot more changes in the future. Kids, finances, a new house? (and mortgage to think about), coordinating household schedules, chores, health.
But right now, I'm having fun at work. I was able to stick around in spirit (via telephone lines) until my mom has gotten another clean bill of health. I can put up with the "unpopular personalities" around that some people warned me about, without a shudder. I am doing well in this whole wifey thing to my spouse. And hopefully to this whole mommy thing to my stepdaughter (who is with us on holidays and school breaks). I drink wine, laugh and hang out with my stepdaughter's mom, which I actually enjoy. I can drive around now without cops scaring the *beep* out of me. Most of all, I gave birth to an angel son who is now watching over me.
So, pat on the back it is...
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