Truffles

It's late...I'm wide awake...

craving for Anette's Truffles.

That bittersweet chocolate that explodes into

a luxuriously warm touch of wine

rolling down my tongue...

What the heck...Pahingi naman!!!

Bi-aaaatch in the Prayer Room

While I was raging upset, I considered this Blog-worthy...now, I'm having second thoughts about it.  I don't feel a thing anymore, but I still want to prove the point. Oh well, it's this part of me that just doesn't back down on people with an attitude. I may be nice, but I enjoy putting someone to his place when the situation calls for it. Watch out!


Okay, so I started my secret birthday get-away in the prayer room.  I was so excited to pray and spend the first hours of my birthday with God, that I forgot the rules! (Take off your shoes in the Prayer Room, before the Blessed Sacrament).  So there I was oblivious to the world when a fat old lady (sense my feelings here? hahaha) approached me and said in a really loud and arrogant way "you know, in the prayer room, you take off your shoes. Take that off. Even I do that. Even Priests do that...Look at me...I do that...yada yada yada".  Ofcourse I knew that, I just completely forgot.  But she could have said it in a nicer way.  She sounded like she's the mean fashion police in there and even more kingly than the One we were actually praying to. Imagine a religious woman who leaves her prayer chair in the middle of prayer just to bitch around. ("Our Father who art in heaven, holy be....wait, here's some bully material.....give us today our daily bread..."). Exactly how we imagine that "Mrs. Know-It-All, Old Lady Mean Mother Butler of the Church" stereotype. I did what she told me to do but I wasn't in the mood to be meek that day. She made me feel so stupid on the most sacred day of my life.  Like I didn't know anything about the Church (Excuse ME!). Like I was some ignorant Paris Hilton copy who was bound to pluck eyebrows on Holy Ground. And I am nothing like that!  (It's not my fault that I look gorgeous hahaha *jk*, and I'm certainly no dumb belle). So, she thought she scored a point on me when she went back to her seat to say the rosary (dang how these women can be rude one second, and pretend to be an angel on the next breath...) Good thing I had my journal with me. I tore off a page and wrote her a letter. (I would have approached her but I wasn't going to create a scene among those who were there praying and not caring about other people's shoes). I explained that she shouldn't have done that and should have said it in a nicer way instead, as a woman of the church blah blah blah...,that she did sound like she was the only child of God who knew everything in prayer....blah blah blah,...and that I'm very sorry for it, not to her, but to God.  God probably wouldn't even have cared if I was wearing the shoes which my hubby calls Hooker Boots (for Role Play ;P *jk*). Hehehe. So I stood up, and handed her the letter.  I was bent on teaching her that she should stop being arrogant in her ways and I was out to prove that she was wrong about her impression of me. Normally, I wouldn't have cared.  But this woman had to learn her lesson...


First, she should know that there's always a nicer way of saying even the ugliest of things. Not really sugar-coating them but I call it "Breaking it to me gently" style.  What if she did that to a depressed and suicidal kind of person who came to the prayer room as his last resort, how would that person feel being short of kicked out of the House of God? She's also a regular in church, her behavior should reflect the teachings. Maybe that's why some just turn their backs on the Catholic Faith. It's the people that represent it. Well, I'm not about to digress into a dissertation on the Effects of Swell-Headed Mother Butlers on Catholics. Well, on the other hand, MAYBE I WAS JUST OVER-REACTING :o) .  I think so...haha. Because it happened on my special day. But then again, someone has to put her to her place eventually and I took the liberty of being the one to do it.  Everyone is fighting their own battles.  I had my own set of concerns to pray for and certainly, I didn't need someone like her pushing me out of momentum. Well, maybe she was that way too because she's fighting her own battles. (a severe case of constipation?) Then I'll just try to understand as well. On hindsight, I probably should have remained meek and patient. But then again, I usually choose my cases.


After I gave the letter, I felt better and was able to concentrate on my prayers. At least that's the ony bad thing that happened on my birthday. Nothing is perfect anyway. That old woman almost made me walk out on her, but then, I would have walked out on God too. And the devil would have won that day.  No way.

My Birthday Thoughts

My birthdays have always been sacred and special for me (well, whose birthday isn't?). It has always been a celebration of life ...a thanksgiving to God for all the blessings and graces bestowed upon me throughout the year. And mine were mostly celebrated with the special people in my life...partying with friends or eating out, drinking, playing, dancing, out of town trips, eating...eating...eating.

Lately though, I've been so busy (busier than when I was Sales Manager...or when I was Lead Teacher or when I was wrestling with my papers for my Masteral Studies!) And to think, now I'm practically a stay-at-home wifey!  I guess that happens.  Just because one isn't working, family and friends tend to think he has all the time in the world to do things for them. But I'm not complaining.  Just laughing at the realization of how much responsibilities I have on my shoulders now.  The Christmas rush is here, I have tons of paperwork for my mom's upcoming reunion and stuff to do for family, and other things to do that other people may only begin to miss when I decide to pack my bags and give Harry Potter a visit in Hogwarts.

I just wanted to stress the point that it has been chaotic for me lately.  Not depressive, just chaotic. Lots of parties too, lots of fun, lots of noise.  I remember telling my friend Raquel that I am thankful for the good life I have been born into and the way of life my family introduced me to...that includes the social circle and the never-ending parade of events I usually need to go to. But yes, I do long for the simple life too. 

I guess that's one of the things I am hoping for in the States, where no one really knows me, or where we live close enough to be in touch but far enough to get too entangled with so much stuff. (Although I was quite disappointed with the privacy I wished for in the States when not too long ago, my hubby and I experienced THE GREAT PINOY GOSSIP of all time - thanks to some nosy people who didn't leave the bad habit behind when they migrated from PI).  But well, I think of myself as part-selfish still, about giving it all up, where my family name is almost passport to anything, (being able to cut through long queues, getting VIP privileges), and most of all, being regarded with respect even without trying to earn it.

Geez, I think I said too much.  I just want to say that for this year, I wanted some silence in my life even for just a day. I wanted to dedicate my birthday toward refocusing and centering myself once again, re-owning my life, tuning out all the noise and just letting all the peace set in, getting ready for another year of new experiences and the wisdom that come with these.

And so for my birthday (Dec. 16th), I disappeared from everybody for a change (not a lot of people had real good clues where I was and it was fun just thinking about it, weehee!!!).  I moved my occasional "LOVE MYSELF DAY" to this day and it was a quiet celebration thanking God for being born.  I got what I wanted. Privacy, Peace, Serenity among others.  Heaven did it again.  I'm spoiled and happy. See, God always lets me get my way.  And so now, I'm ready for people again.

Happy Thoughts

Okay, so the past week had been great! I spent a lot of quality time with my brother-in-law Edwin and his wife Bingbing (who I happened to be friends with since 5th grade!)...We had a blast, eating, singing, and behaving like teenagers dancing at El C with our friends... (The same circle who's been there for my hubby and me when we were just starting).  Today though,  some things took a sharp turn.  Oh it has nothing to do with my bro, haha.  But things made me so sad today. Really rock-bottom sad.  I know this too will pass but you know how it is when things just seem to be the end of the world. I'm just trying to think happy thoughts right now.  Somehow, they help me pull through all the time, really!  So what kind of happy thoughts am I thinking of? I stored some pretty good ones in my memory bank for emergency, specifically for times like this! Let me see...first would be, when Aldred said "Finally, you're the ONE. I love you and I want you to be my wife." That made me cry buckets...What else? Oh, yeah, me and my friend Merv many years back in Manila during one of my first times driving around the city, I actually reached several places twice in a row ("Hey Clarisse, didn't we see this same statue an hour ago?")...we were laughing so hard that he actually told me to remember that day whenever I'm sad (here you go, Merv, I remembered!). What else, oh, my famous "Caroline thoughts".  I will always remember that teaching year with her as my student.  She sure left me with so much memories I couldn't even count them.  But that one memory that always brings a smile to my face is when she said "Teacher C, I love you more than you love me" and I said "No, Caroline, I love you more than you love me".  And she said "But Teacher C, I love you 155 thousand times! See, I love you more than you love me". 

SEE, I FEEL BETTER ALREADY...

Tough cookies don't crumble...

Lately, life has posed a lot of nerve-wracking challenges for me, which threw me into a rollercoaster of emotional ups and downs.  I'm not about to go through the nitty-gritty details of my life (as always...you know how much I abhor gossip), but what I do want to say is that I think I'm coming out tougher than ever.  And to think I have always thought I can already give Andres Bonifacio a run for his money! My friends always said I am a tough cookie.  I'm just happy to have finally proven that, once again.  Maybe it's my infectious optimism about life, or my Brady Bunch family tree, or just pure luck.  Or well, maybe, it's what I have learned in stick-fighting / Arnis...the stronger you blow, the more painful the hand feels, but eventually it goes away, and if you just keep fighting, it will be all worth it. I'm just happy with myself.  I'm happy with the journey God blesses me with.  My heart is overflowing with love.  And I can laugh and play and dance whenever I please.   But it sure doesn't take away the fact that things are making me tougher than I already am.  I remembered my favorite line in A Few Good Men, as said by Colonel Jessep (Jack Nicholson)... ''I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.''  Why did I put that here?  Simply because that is soooo ME!

 

Liars Got To Hell

that's all...

Ok here we go...

Wow. Talk about first times! This is my first time to BLOG, but come to think of it, most of my close friends know about "Angella's Thought for the Day" (That's me!). Yup, that everyday message I used to pass on back in those days when unlimited text messaging was free...and maybe way before this Blog fever even caught up.  It's 3 am, AS USUAL and I'm not sleepy.  I have long been waiting for a great opportunity to start my Blog.  I envisioned it to be grand, but ok, here we go! Nothing.  No fireworks, no drumroll.  Just me, sitting here by myself, missing my hubby. So lonely... HAHAHA!!!! ;O) Gotcha! I'm actually just tripping, I'm okay and happy.  Yes, I do miss hubby but 1 more month and I'll be back in his arms. Woohoo!!!.  I just can't wait.

Seriously now...wow, so this is what it feels like to be on the patient's couch.  I'm just so used to being the Shrink, sorting things out for others, that I forget how it feels to be listened to...or analyzed (which I hate)...well...strange...(I MISS MAY ANN).  So this is how it feels to talk to me! Just jokin'. But well yeah, whoever you are reading this, you're my shrink now, you have this tall order to keep me sane in bad times, stay with me in sad times, and most of all, laugh with me during the best of times.  I leave you no choice.  NiTeY-NiTeY!!! ;)

PS. I have a 3-day old extra piercing on my right ear (the cartilage part)...it still hurts.  Can't wait to wear the bling! ;)

Owner's Profile

AS FLEETING AS MY FLEETING ATTENTION, CATCH ME IF YOU CAN.  OR THROW A FLARE, BRIGHT LIGHTS ATTRACT ME! 

[breathing symphony of human dichotomy | sublime spirit | steel magnolia | student of life | teacher of life | braveheart | artist | dream weaver | love and light | old soul | eternal child | the last unicorn (i'm alive)] 

[inner space cosmonaut | possibilitarian | grateful being | sociable introvert | truth advocate | restless | infinite |  candid. funny. deep | crazy woman | closet geek | dudette | dancing queen | wonder wifey | chanelophile | instant.human.just.add.coffee ]

“Kináng Tala” || Lumang Tao || Lahing Kumintang || Sining. Damdamin. Pangarap. Tatak.

I believe that “the unexamined life is not worth living.”

That was Socrates speaking.

Psychologist/Teacher/Child Dev. Specialist. Professionally, these are everything I'm NOT anymore but I'm still all those in my heart.

I'm happily married to my soulmate who's tough but sweet (and I'm sweet but tough). It's a balanced equation. I have recently come to terms with the fact that I have perhaps wasted graduate studies I worked hard for as I aborted my thesis prematurely when I got whisked away (to the US of A!) by LOVE. *aaaaarrrrgh!*

I am a breathing symphony of human dichotomy.

A bundle of contradictions: I love going out but I'm happy staying home; patient but I don't back down if fairness is at stake; simple with good taste, I love dancing to loud music but I also drink the cosmic serenity of a moonlit nightsky. Candid and funny but deep, a CRAZY woman, a closet geek. I like to talk though I'm sometimes quiet because I'm a THINKER & a DREAMER-- that explains my Attention Deficit! I've got this unquenchable thirst for life's truths, celebrating personal discoveries about the world and proud of my own scheme of things!

I dance in my head all the time, I eat books for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I paint, sketch and create different things with my hands. I guess I'm generally a positive person. I'm satisfied with my life and the choices I've made. Some were letdowns but they gave me the best of life's lessons, so there are no regrets. God blessed me with a journey that told me early of who I am (becoming) and what I want in life while knowing that it doesn't stop there. I would like to make the world a better place for anyone I meet in my own little way, to listen, love, understand and hopefully be the wind beneath their wings. I believe that HAPPINESS IS EVERYWHERE, JUST DON'T BE TOO PICKY. And hey, I've got this big passion for life! I don't fear going beyond my comfort zones and embracing changes because I believe that life should be meaningful and we only got one to live! Join the fun?

The person behind these blogs from the heart...

and art websites...

 

(button to follow: Stainsanity Studios)

memoirs...

 

(button to follow: This Old House)

...and these monetized sites that help contribute to the Chanel shopping fund (my only whim aside from art materials, really)...

...and the now defunct one that has already said goodnight (posts have been migrated and are preserved in Sublime Spirit):