miscellanea

Three things why I can’t really lose weight:

1. Monica gave me two slices of her pizza for lunch. You would think I was going to give up at least half of my chowmein lunch before I got down to pizza-eating business. No.

2. I was supposed to walk half my lunch break off today. But then, the pizza.

3. I am so lazy. Dang Moe, you served me pizza on our company’s lunchroom china. Ergo, the chore of washing it during my coffee (non-coffee) break when I could be nesting on my seat incubating fat cells. You know, pizza. Good pizza!

Three things why I’m excited about the weekend:

1. My hula performance tomorrow and I have a truckload of relatives who are watching.

2. Falafel Drive-In in San Jose! (if we have time to eat there)

3. My costume! I’m wearing a red ahuroa dress, a tiare (flower) on my right ear…they say all hula wahines are always “available” weehee, and the hula hair! (big puffy frizzy lengths – I should start setting it by braiding the corn rows tonight). And by the way, yes, the costume makes my heart jump –- I feel like a 6-year old all over again.

Three things why I can’t wait to come home today:

1. I need to check if I have enough hair rubberbands to hold my braids tonight. I can’t go to the last minute rehearsals in the morning with my braids clamped by a smorgasbord of hair implements like my head is one over-decorated whore octopus.

2. Hubby promised me a simple dinner date at Pasta Pomodoro tonight. Shall I go out with my octopus hair on? I wonder what outfit will look good with it…

3. I need to use the bathroom soon. You know, pizza.

The Sunday Choir Lady

It seems that 1 of every 5 people I bump into has the “smart a$$” blood running in his veins. What gives? They are either spewing “smart A" remarks at people or, inundating the world with “hello, duh, what were you thinking?” insults, seemingly believing that they are perfect, godly creatures out to ridicule the less perfect mortals. For instance, I overheard a not-so-pretty woman comment on a not-so-pretty woman (same boat! gee…) but with disheveled hair to a crowd of twelve, “can somebody phu-leez donate a hairbrush to her???”

I’m not like that. I may be witty in my writings but I’ll make fun of myself before I am even caught attacking people in reckless mockery. I’m not perfect. Well, who is?

HOWEVAH!!!...

Last Sunday at church, either the “smart A$$” factor has truly rubbed off on me, or the devil was at work (again?), perched on my shoulder. OR MAYBE THE CHOIR LADY WAS REALLY JUST SINGING OFF-KEY!@#$%*&@#!  Alas! I finally realized why for one Sunday too many, it always felt that something was always horribly NOT going right. She has a good soprano-ish voice, yes, but most high notes fall flat. She must have a penchant for singing second voice all-throughout!!!  My unquenchable rage formed into a ball that I wanted to throw at her when I saw how she would occasionally slave-drive, direct and correct the choir members. (I figured this one furtive sneer I caught from a choir member some months ago wasn’t totally unfounded).

Or maybe it’s just me. Okay, my ears are off-key.  !?@#$%!&*@!

But yeah, she’s doing her best. She’s doing her best at what makes her happiest. How can I oppose that? And she’s serving God and God’s people. Plus her sweet smile oozes with unwavering dedication to the church. How can I go up against that?

I love to write and I love to dance. Though I’m not exactly the best there is, I’m over the moon when I do them.

What if someone says I simply can’t?

Boredom Buster

…it’s tax season and our business is slow…hecka slow…and so i’m so hecka bored!

...when someone like me finally crosses that thin line to boredom, that means it’s totally freaking boring!!! 2 minutes more and i’ll have my coffee break (how ironic since i gave up caffeine, yes, that includes tea and chocolate products for what seems like 20 million years ago)…so i just started writing this. writing gets me into a time warp of sorts. hopefully in the next jiffy, i’ll be strutting down the aisles of Safeway picking out stuff to cook for the whole week…oh yeah, i’m making mini baked crabmeat frittata sometime this week for brunching, snacking and boredom (duh!) purposes. hubby’s so excited because he likes to throw it on top of his rice, laced with Mexican Cholula hot sauce –  fusion cuisine, babie!

…i just made a geeky discovery while i’m on this boredom thingy.  i was flipping and twirling my pen between my index and middle finger, baton-style and noticed that the pen looks animated (like you see a bunch of pen images at every angle of the flip similar to several cartoon frames that didn’t transition smoothly —like it was doing a fast statue dance---what you look like under a flickering white strobe light in a club) when you twirl it in front of a computer monitor. and i noticed that it doesn’t do that when you twirl it against the fluorescent desk light…or the view of the ceiling or my co-worker's face. i tried it halfway in front and halfway off and i see the big difference. i noticed that anything you move across the computer monitor produces the same image behavior, like when you wag your hand repeatedly in front of it for instance. are you trying it right now?

…my co-worker just caught me doing it while trying a couple more disturbing stunts. i won’t be surprised if within the next few hours, dark-suited men wearing sunglasses will come marching through the glass doors of my workplace (no, wait, that’s a different movie); dragging me away to an asylum where they house people who develop startling behavioral deviations during their coffee, uh uhrm, non-coffee breaks.

Amazing "Rays"

The first turn I make on the way home from work gets me driving into the sunset everyday. It's always an amazing view by the bay...San Francisco skyline on my right, hills on my left, infinity up ahead, the water uniting all these and of course, the setting sun.

Today, I think I saw one of the most amazing things! It had been cold, gray and occasionally raining today. Picture this, while I was driving facing the bay toward the water (the road Ts to the left and right), the sky was so gray but there was a hole in the middle as if it just ripped open.  The sun shone through that bright hole, the light piercing into some clouds splitting into five maybe seven very prominent golden rays which seemed to spill shimmering silver dust on the farther side of the ocean. It was one huge pool of shining liquid light at the tip of the rays, as if a silver layer was laid on top of the water. A silver lining, literally! Before my very eyes...

I was so awed I stopped a little bit longer than what is required at the stop sign before I finally turned right. (I tried my best to dig for my camera-phone, but I realized it wouldn't do the awesome sight any justice anyway).

I knew I should have brought my camera! I always regreted not having it each time I saw a beautiful sunset but I keep forgetting.  Now I don't have anything to share with you.  *frown*

Today, I was sooooo close to capturing a picture of God. I'll always bring my camera from now on. I'll be His paparazzi. Hopefully next time, I'll finally catch Him in action.

For Toni

Just a little something which a young "friend" asked from me. My response to her thoughts:

HEY THERE! I guess one big reason why I'm drawn to your blogs is because they make me retrace the steps I made in the same school halls...18 1/2 friggin' yrs. ago (I would have raised one almost grown up person since then) and this is my post-"you at the present"-me wanting to share what I've learned thus far (not by books, but by experience):

1. Fear is USUALLY bigger than the actual situation --most of the time! but fear is healthy, it drives us to do more...in order to achieve a fearless/painless state (our perceived success). Hate to burst that bubble but once we get into the next step...there's more fear-inducing things...it's a life-long process/cycle of facing and overcoming. It is one of the catalysts of GROWTH. and to grow is something we do for life. (which gets us to #2)

2. The challenges in school get us ready for the real-life challenges out there (it makes us feel more confident in tackling them because we know we've been there, done that...lalala)..it also holds true when we take the challenges of the first job...then when we proceed to the next..and unto the next (why do you think there is such a cliche as "LIFE IS A SCHOOL" --because it rings a hell lot of truth in it, from generation to generation.

3. Get the "chess game" mindset. If you think they are outsmarting you...try to look for ways to outsmart them...rather than get intimidated. No one else can judge your capabilities (nor put you down) but teachers have a right for now...that's what they are there for!!! as long as it still is a healthy challenge --and is not truly EXTREMELY morally and psychologically damaging. (you know what I mean)...give them that right for now. It's what the tuition is for. The universe conspires to make things happen around you because you need it, ergo, God feels you need it...in a religous point of view, He is getting you ready for something bigger. That's something for certain.

4. 18 years from now now..or even 5, maybe even 3, your teacher's opinion or grades won't matter. (but it's up to you if you want to keep that engraved in your heart forever)...while it is good to get good grades and be a diligent student (it's all about your participation now in the formation of the future "you"---and good grades will get you a better job than others in some cases...better job=better opportunities; and ofcourse, wouldn't it be nice to look back one day to your academic accomplishments and be a role model to your offsprings)...BUT one day, what will matter is what you will do at that present moment in the future...you will be dealing with more personalities: boss, spouse, kids (for them you will be boss!!!hahaha), co-workers etc. and what will matter is what kind of person you will be (values and all), in real-life situations.

5. Always remember, just because in someone's eyes, you are not good enough, it doesn't mean you aren't good enough.  It's their standards...not yours.  What matters is that you know you always do your best with your God-given gifts.

6. Deal with your thesis and make sure you know everything when you defend it...even the most trivial little things, formulas --you gotta understand.

8. Relax

9. Smile!

10. I'm proud of you!!!

(I just realized I forgot #7. You see, it's okay to fail. We're only human. Just don't be a "loser")

Best of luck!!!

PS...just do your best for now. whether you succeed or not --but most people who do their best succeed...when you do an assessment of things, if you've gone in that direction of doing your best, you'll realize that there is nothing else you could have done no matter what the outcome will be. You can make peace with that.

Wanted: A Smarter GPS

            We went house-hunting last Sunday and we got a “little” lost. But we had the GPS on! These navigating thingamabobs may be infamous for making you take the traditional long winding route to a destination, but in the end, still gets you to where you want to go, doesn’t it?

            It isn’t the first time that hubby did not listen to the GPS!  Let me put it this way, it’s not the first time that hubby “disagreed” with the GPS and followed his own satellite coordinates (ego-experience-skill triangulation?)

            What is with men and their navigating pride-slash-arrogance? It’s an accepted fact that they will refuse to ask for directions no matter what it takes…but “verbally” argue with the GPS? Really???

            I just watched the debate quietly in the passenger seat.

Presenting the Cyborg-ish Voice vs. The Hard-headed Driver:

GPS:                 *Prepare to turn right*

Hubby ignores the turn.

GPS:                 *Route re-cal-cu-la-tion*

Hubby keeps on going.

GPS:                 *In 100 yards, turn right*

Hubby:             You’re showing me the wrong way.

Hubby turns left.

Hubby:             I know it’s off

Park St

.

GPS:                 *Turn back*

*Wifey in her mind, “whatever…just keep on going guys while I enjoy the show.”

GPS:                 *Route re-cal-cu-la-tion*

Hubby:             Shut up! You’re showing me the wrong way!

GPS:                 *Turn back*…*Turn back*….*Turn back*…*Turn back*…*Turn back*….*Turn back*…*Turn back*…*Turn back*….*Turn back*…*Turn back*…*Turn back*….*Turn back*

          
After a few more “interesting” moments, I finally heard, “You have arrived at your destination.”  That left me wondering, who brought me to my destination, The Cyborg-ish Voice or the The Hard-headed Driver???

What if a GPS can be really smarter, assertive and more logical? Like maybe one day, we can use a talking-back GPS…something with a more assertive software that can say “NO” or “WHAT DID I SAY, I TOLD YOU TO TURN BACK,” or something like “NO, I’M THE BOSS.  YOU SHUT THE FREAK UP!” Or how about one with a built-in fist that can launch a punch on the nose when you get too stubborn?  That would be a GPES - Global Positioning Entertainment System - for me.

It’s just a suggestion. Got any ideas?

   

Arue te Atua poiete

Someone asked me if I was going to do hula for a long time. My answer was “I dunno”. Hubby and I made a pact that if our personal activities (my hula, his softball, my blogging, his internet-surfing, etc) “get in the nerves” of our relationship or family life schedule-wise, it will be time to toss it down to the bottom of our list. It isn’t the point of my “I dunno” though.  I dunno.  Things can change. Maybe one day I won’t like it anymore. Or I can’t physically do it. Or my halau for some reason packs up. I dunno. I studied the old 60-ish lady kaholo-ing beside me last night. Who knows, maybe I’ll even do it forever. I know at this point that I want to. But I dunno...

        

My life has been a list of finished projects and the un.  Went to school, played the piano, finished college, got great jobs, did all that. I excelled at my work, but left some. I took masteral studies but aborted right before thesis writing (got whisked off by love *regretful* – just a wee bit).  So yeah, I have my share of unfinished business here and there. But looking back, the remorse is little.  And I refuse to say that I have the heart of a loser.  As an ordinary (not completely unskilled or ignorant) person loving life, I try to live it to the fullest by exploring different things if not necessarily seeing the end in some. Bad.  Bad???

        

Never leave stuff half-baked in most of life’s endeavors. That’s ideal. But I believe that when we can’t help it, it’s okay to stop at some point when we know we’ve gotten what we wanted or needed, or that we’ve given enough. The picture always changes. The situation shifts, or we do.  It’s rather too personal a journey which social norms can’t dictate. Just because one studied to be a lawyer doesn’t mean he should be punished if he chooses to be a circus performer later on in his life. It is all about following one’s heart’s desires—WHEN YOU CAN AFFORD TO. Our lives consist of hits and misses.  Come to think of it, misses pave the way for searching new opportunities that end up giving us joy –-even the teeny tiniest ones are classified under the “Successes” column. So for whatever it has been, forgive yourself and move on to the next. There is a multitude of options waiting to be tapped.

When my youngest sister was little, she said “This year I’m doing ballet, next year Tae Kwon Do…15 years from now I’ll be an archaeologist, 20 years…I’ll travel the world…” Being the oldest one raised in a strict and structured environment, my little sister taught me how to think outside the box. Don’t get me wrong, I had a beautiful, pleasant, wholesome and peaceful childhood…though I must say, sheltered and a bit single-tracked, experience-wise.  Hmmm, did my little sister actually set me free?

         Now, my life is full of experimenting forward, and analyzing backward. Without losing the balance of course. Planning and foresight are necessary too. I’m aware of the things I want to do but still uncertain of the order and I’m looking forward to discovering more. I play it by ear depending on the circumstances on my plate. Now I’m focusing on my role as a “workin’ hula-hottie-chefy-wifey hoping to be a mommy someday soon”. You know what, when I’m 80, I’ll finally realize what I have always wanted to do on the side “when I grow up” by looking back and picking my favorites.  For now, I’ll keep doing, being, and living. Maybe hula today---let me do that one show and I'll be content (maybe), Arnis/stickfighting tomorrow (still want to go back to it when my wrist gets better), learn French (even after almost 6 months of audio tape all I can say today is “Bonjour”!!!), and yes, my own art exhibit. Even watching the sunset from different places has a spot in my goal list!  Professionally, I’m done being a Sales Manager, a psychologist-in-training, a teacher. But personally, I’m still all of those---will always be. I want to be a licensed therapist/counselor/life coach one day. Or something close to it, like finally publish that book. (Hey am I not starting now?)

        

My grandmother always said “A rolling stone gathers no moss”. At some point, you realize this may hold significance, but not always. It doesn’t make me jack of all trades master of none. My experiences will only make me multi-talented (and fulfilled). My cousin tells his teenage son “I don’t care what you plan to do, as long as you don’t stop doing something.” In other words…LIVE.

        I might neither be a genius nor a gifted child but when I grow up…uhrm, I mean, get older, I’ll be a master of LIFE, the best school in the world. I will not change this picture.

Happy Valentine's Day

I found the perfect valentine card for hubby at Target last Monday. It says:

For My Husband, My Soulmate

If we had never met,

I don’t know what I’d do…

 

I mean, who would I be my true, silly self with?

Who would I drag along on all my whimsical adventures?

Who would be my voice of reason?

Who would I tell my spontaneous revelations to?

Who would help me analyze all my troubles?

Who would know just the right thing to say to make me smile?

Who else would love and appreciate me just the way I am?

Who would be all you are to me---

My husband, my soul mate, my very best friend?

          How can Hallmark know exactly what I want to say?

L.A.

         My mind is filled with thoughts of Chicken Teriyaki at this hour. And coffee.  Coffee! It’s been almost a week since I had my last cup and I’m already losing my mind, especially because I work down the street from the headquarters of Pete’s Coffee. One more day without my caffeine fix and you’ll have to lug me out of this madness…in a straitjacket (duh!). My head hurts, I’m feeling so lethargic, and I’m oh so achy all over. Really!  Does one really get withdrawal symptoms from caffeine? I feel like my head is going to burst.  Inward. So yes, maybe. 

          But I had a real tiring week too ---when do I have one that isn't?  My inner psyche (well, is there an outer psyche?)…is screaming for a quiet weekend to myself again (here comes the cave lady).  Hopefully, this coming long weekend.  President’s Day on Monday…hip hip hooray! Not that it means anything to me –yet. All that matters is I get a day off from work, and hopefully I’ll get to stay home to attend to personal stuff, for once. 

          Hubby and I went to L.A. last weekend. We visited my stepdaughter and watched her color guard debut competition last Saturday.  It was really lovely and I’m so glad we came!  They rocked! They won! The rest of Saturday I spent taking her and a nephew to the Ontario Mills mall (my mall!!!) while hubby snoozed in the hotel -–the 6-hr+ drive ain’t a piece of cake, especially if you have to do it by yourself with wifey transforming into an inanimate object in the passenger seat --snoring.  Shopping was a blast, though it left us with a disease called “Funds-ah-lo” heehee. And Ayres Suites! Our second home down south.  The scents in the hotel (uhm, carpet cleaners, is it? I’m weird huh), the clean suite, the crisp linens, the elevator, the fitness center, the breakfast buffet and even the fresh bar of oatmeal soap in the lavatory…they are all my friends who always wait for my visit and welcome me with open arms.

          Saturday night, we finally…finally…finally…went back to The Yard House.  It’s a Restaurant and Bar located in Victoria Gardens , an open-air town center at the heart of a 160-acre main street community located in Rancho Cucamonga .  I had Scallops and Crimini mushrooms with Orzo pasta and vodka cream sauce, and a Pomegranate Martini.  The contrast in the taste and texture of the food and drink is mind-bending! Hubby opted for Seared Ahi with black bean sauce and grilled asparagus, a real winner. The one-hour wait and the price we paid was all worth it (once a year haha). Dessert was at Pinkberry’s, where we got frozen yogurt topped with fresh fruit (oooh  lala).  Sunday morning, it was the usual breakfast of eggs, sausages, hash browns and French toast at Ayres Suites. Then we hit the hotel gymn for an hour (no wonder my calves are so sore right now). The visit to L.A. wouldn’t be complete without a visit to Toto’s Lechong Manok in West Covina for lunch –-simple everyday Filipino food at its authentic best! Then dessert of Halo-Halo at Chowking. And a short look at Manila Gifts, a Filipino store next door where you can find DVDs of pinoy movies, capiz this, capiz that, Johnson’s Baby Cologne, Eskinol, pH Care, sebo de macho (!?), chin-chun-su (!?!?), down to the ol’ reliable walis…and UP, Ateneo, and De La Salle stickers (!?!?!?).

          Then we headed back to Corona to bring step-doe back to their house (mom, stepdad and lil sis, people I always look forward to seeing in L.A.) Halfway back up north, we stopped by Love’s at Lost Hills.  It’s my favorite pitstop. Hubby said he’s not surprised because the convenience store smells like ShoeMart.  We picked up a quick snack of  Fried Jalapenos and Mozarella sticks with Broncoberry sauce at Arby’s then headed straight home.  I’m sad that one step in this routine fell out recently…We don’t usually make it to Harris Ranch for dinner anymore because they close before we reach them. We made it home at 10:45p, one of the earliest arrivals among our recent trips so far. Went to bed then went to work the next day – yesterday.

          I was just remembering.  While we were at breakfast at Ayres Suites last Sunday, my stepdaughter blurted out, “My dad’s lucky to have you.”

          In each walk we take in our life, we may find ourselves doing the same routine repeatedly.  Each experience and memory though, are always different.

He watched me by the glass window

         Sounds like a deep title, doesn’t it? Not really, but I thought it would be cute to remember last night with.

          When I came home from hula class, hubby said he saw me dancing. I didn’t believe it until he told me little details. Turns out he picked up our dinner from the Mexican Taqueria next door to the dance studio. Curious faces would occasionally turn up on the other side of the glass window to try to peep into what we’re doing.  Last night, I saw a few passing faces and it turns out his was one of those I didn’t catch. He saw me enjoying one of my favorite things, he saw me doing my best, he witnessed me being “me” in a different place outside his world. And I didn’t have a clue that he was watching all the while. I know I made him proud.  One time, he said he likes to call my direct line at work to listen to my voice message. It was “me” at work, doing something I’m good at and shining in a different world. And the best part? Me saying my name with his last name, affirming that I am his.

He came back home and simply waited until my class was over. I recall one of my old friends telling me before I got married, “save and keep a lot of good memories about your relationship, these will anchor your ship firmly during --heaven forbid!-- stormy seas.” 

Last night will be one of those.

(written: 02/06/08)

The Wifeyteria Chronicles: A-dow-bow

Foodie’s doing the dance of joy! I made pork asado last night.  Actually it’s Batangas adobo with a twist =  manila adobo =  asado for Batangueno’s like moi, potatoes and all!

And we had leftovers to bring to work, woohoo! I reckon I can’t keep pretending that I’ll survive on wheat thins and coffee for lunch all week so I packed me some rice and asado, uhrm, adobo today.  It’s one confused dish, I know, but it’s hella yummy!

I decided to eat lunch at my cube too (laziest…).  When I opened my lunch box, a colossal whiff of garlic filled my area. I normally get self-conscious about these things amongst my sandwich and salad eating co-workers but I’d rather fill their nostrils with garlic (or anchovy…or shrimp paste aka bagoong!!!...or any pickled whatever --no, not really) than pull my butt off my chair and head for the lunch room (actually, my shift coincides with the president’s, and he eats in the lunch room…and I don’t have anything interesting to tell him; if I say something nice I might be a Kiss-A$$, if I say something bad, I might earn me a spot in the bad guys list, if I talk about the weather, I might sound too boring. I get too worked up on very trivial things do I… er,  I just don’t feel like it! that’s why)

Monica just had to barge into my cube to give me some of my favorite sugar-free dark chocolates from Trader Joe’s for dessert. I asked her if she smelled the garlic and she politely said, “Don’t even worry about it, if it does, I’m sure it will smell appetizingly good”.  Good ol’ Moe… I told her what I was eating, and promised her a small pot next time.  If I told her to have some today, I know she would have some.  She always shares with me all these organic, fat-free, sugar-free doohickeys she comes up with.  Maybe next time.  I’m really hungry today. Greedy, huh!

By the way,here’s some “HOT" ADOBO 4 U.Click on!

Oxygenation

(WARNING: this is lengthy)

            I can’t believe I shot out three posts last week.  My boss is still away and it’s still too cold outside for lunch break walks (bbrrrrr!), so I’m here at my desk typing away, over Sundried tomato and Basil Wheat Thins and a cup of black coffee.  I’ll be taking coffee off my life for 40 days again starting on Ash Wednesday, so I guess that explains why I’m trying my darnest to hoard up as much caffeine as I can into my already poor system (can’t help it!).

        Saturday allowed me some pretty good respite from it all.  Hubby and I hang out with his buddies from work, a couple with a baby.  The wife (Cherl) and I were booked for some pampering at the spa courtesy of our husbands.  Hubby and his buddy went to the mall with the baby (Cherl and I were sure they looked like a gay couple with a baby…it’s kind of funny thinking about it, not that there is anything wrong with it, it’s really cute). I had an oxygenated facial with ultrasonic dermabrasion (oh mother of all skin pampering!!!) and a good massage which really helped my backaches a lot.  The masseuse noted that I do have a collection of “crunchies” in my muscles, meaning I’m either stressed, or I don’t move a lot…OR BOTH. 

        On the drive to the spa and back, Cherl and I talked about life in general.  I found myself thanking her for letting me join her self-pampering day.  She also thanked me for coming over.  Then I realized, as I was saying it, I don’t really get to hang out with girl friends a lot anymore.  First of all, I haven’t really made that many in my two years here.  Not that friendship has been scarce; I do have my sister, my cousins, and a handful of old friends that I see regularly, and who I’m really fond of.  But I do miss having my own branch of friends who are neither blood-related nor “work”-related. Or simply put, the kind of people who share the exact same interests with you, won’t personally know some people you might find yourself in one way or another bitching about, won’t suck the energy out of you, or those who will simply let you be yourself, without expectations.  I’m usually slow to warm up because trust is a very sacred thing to me. I know in my heart that I can be fully trusted so I end up yearning for the same.  That’s why, I’m usually picky, or sometimes reserved.  I usually clam up when commitment is concerned, I know I do have a lot of growing up to do still.  But once I award the term “friend”, I always, at no cost, give my very best. I think that’s why I don’t spread myself too thinly.  I’m after quality.  But then of course, there is this huge hunger which surfaces now once in a while. And it doesn’t mean I’m demoting my old best friends into the backseat either. Occasionally, I just find myself craving for more.

Eversince I got married and moved here to California, I gravitated toward my husband’s friends for new acquaintances, my extended family and his.  Is this the usual thing that happens to a married person, where you inherit your spouse’s friends, or your spouse’s friend’s spouses; and he inherits yours? I have my favorite buddies (friends-in-the making?) at work and at hula class.  Does that sound promising enough?

My bestie at this point is my husband, who’s really everything that a friend can ever be.  He’s my support and buddy 24/7.  And oh how he can also talk about purses, jewelry, other people, 600-count Egyptian cotton sheets, Calphalon pans, shopping, clothes and shoes with me.  I’m lucky to be married to that kind of person.  Our world (his and mine) is an impenetrable paradise of its own. Isn’t that really how it’s supposed to be?

A lot of people end up making new friendships in times of misery and adversity…exactly when one needs a shoulder to cry on.  I’m pretty happy and content with my life and marriage right now, and hopefully not due for any kind of sorrow down the road.  I am, at this point, with no immediate need to raise “a glassful of tears” toast with anyone.  I can’t offer any melodramatic ice-breaker to entice potential takers. I am not a whiner either, but I can be a very good listener and shrink (hahaha).  I could certainly use a “stranger” for me to grow into or who could grow into me.

...Someone who would like to breathe in some light femme moments with me, even just for a rejuvenating oxygenated facial at the spa.