"Blessed"

        My gums were hurting for a few days two weeks ago and so that led me to meeting my american dentist for the first time in a clinic that honors my husband's insurance at downtown SF.  I like the thrill of going through things for the first time in a different place, especially meeting new people and assessing their potential to stay in my "network", uhm, suffice it to say, "life" (not that I do that a lot or by habit, but the thought does pop up in my head once in a while).  It is fun starting out in a different country, looking different amongst a sea of blue-eyed blondes --well, I realize that I am easily lost in an ocean of black-haired browns as well, and seeing what people and strangers can be up to at first meetings. I enjoy my anonymity here (it's not that I'm famous back home either! no, not at all...but surely, I can walk miles and miles around here without bumping into someone who knows my name or at least the highschool I went to...get the drift?)

        Until I met my dentist's asssitant.  She's a full-blooded Pinay, like moi! And it's such a big coincidence that she went to the same highschool I went to, and after dropping a few names here and there (we always tend to do that huh!), we finally unearthed some kind of jurassic connection...even if I must admit that the people I mentioned she probably just heard of, and vice versa. I am relieved and happy to have a kababayan around, and at the same time a little bit cautious like all of us tend to be at first meetings (or is it just me?).  Well, what's the worst that can happen anyway? Maybe the whole Philippine population will know that a simple woman named Clarisse has some degree of tooth decay somewhere, or that I don't know how to brush my teeth properly, or that I'm hecka scared of the drill following a traumatic "sensitive"-in-the-real-sense-of-the-word experience from a bleaching incident in my past-- but, who isn't?  So that isn't bad at all, ain't it? Anyways, where was I? What I sort of wanted to avoid happened. She started telling the other dental assistant/secretary about me, my family heritage and alleged abundant resources which is totally hyped to begin with, my educational background ("She went to De La Salle which is like Stanford here!!!"). YAKKK OH HELLO…REALLY!? I was so embarassed and felt myself blushing while she continued to babble about me. I remember saying quite a bazillion times, "I'm not rich, just blessed."  I kept saying it..."I'm just blessed...I’m not rich but yes, I do have the most wonderful and most beautiful set of parents and a simple family who always chose to be on the good and moral side of things...still hey, my life isn’t perfect. But yes, I'm blessed."  But when her co-worker found out that I am the niece of a cardinal (yeah right, like that is a personal achievement I had to work my arse for!), I started saying I was in Rome and that I saw the Pope several times -- though he most likely never even saw me even if I had the biggest face in the crowd! (I kind of started enjoying it too, you know--I'm only human, yahaha! Plus I secretly wished all these would win me some kind of passport to a painless ride on the dental chair). But, yeah, I'd rather be fussed about with something I achieved by myself than with something I'm just born into.

        But what's my whole point this time? It was when I saw the co-worker's eyes widen in amazement and say  "I come from a very Catholic family and my mom is 90 and her lifelong dream is to see the Pope". No, wait a minute, that's just bacon on my salad. It was when she said "I learned a lot from you today.  You never said the word LUCKY.  You just kept saying YOU ARE BLESSED. Maybe I should do the same thing." She even told the Filipina assistant, "Maybe that's what we should focus on, instead of complain about so many things, or instead of saying we're just lucky when we hit good. After all, God is the source of it all. We should give Him the credit like what this young lady keeps on doing".

        Yes, we are all blessed! Life naturally has it's ups and downs.  But there's never a single day that we aren't blessed with something. Each single breath of life...or even the day we wake up into is a blessing in itself.  Let's keep that in mind. Let's celebrate our blessings! I'm glad I was able to touch someone with how I view my own life. And I hope that she passes it on to a lot of people she meets, inside the clinic and out.  I left the dentist’s with my tooth still hurting from the treatment, but my spirit was soaring.

Happy Fiesta!!!

Here's an article I wrote and was published in the souvenir program of the Batangas City Sto. Nino Association in Northern California:

                  Memoirs of a Batanguena: The Town Fiesta

        The city and its townsfolk might have changed dramatically over the years, but the festive atmosphere surrounding January 16th of each year in honor of the patron saint, the Sto. Nino, carries on. It is a week-long celebration in Batangas City consisting of festivities initiated by the church and the city mayor’s office. Take my hand, I’m going to walk you through an authentic town fiesta experience, the memoirs of which I have chronicled for three decades in my heart while growing up in Batangas City…

        You feel the remaining traces of the cool breeze from the holiday season on your face, as you look up from the street to see buntings and streamers being set up from one light post to another. The traveling amusement has made its way to the sports complex we grew up calling stadium (pronounced in our tongue as “is-tad-yoom”) and you hear the faint sound of the current dance hit squeaking from the loudspeaker at the people’s quadrangle behind the municipal building each night. We attend the 9-day novena each afternoon at the church. You know the fiesta is just around the corner.

        I remember enjoying the trips we used to make to the “perya” at the stadium. It is your typical country amusement fair where you find games such as the bingo (using corn kernels as markers), the spin-a-win, and stalls where you throw loops to win prizes like cups, plates, and stuffed animals. There’s the “beto-beto”, a game where you place a token under one of three upturned cups and a man moves these around briskly for you to track and guess which cup it is with the token underneath. It’s a rather tricky game that leaves you cross-eyed and wondering if anyone ever wins it at all. As you move around to ride the Octopus, the Ferris wheel, and the rollercoaster (all so minute and squeaky compared to Disneyland rides), your nose catches a whiff of popcorn from carts lit by makeshift gas lamps, cotton candy and barbecue being fanned by the vendors.

        You get tired shuttling from one activity to another but you still get excited as a new one is introduced each year. You want to stand on the bridge or by the river bank of the Kalumpang under the scorching sun to watch as they bring the Sto. Nino on a fluvial parade on the water. You hear pigs and goats being slaughtered in the backyards as men begin to cook the famous caldereta while downing bottles of gin and beer. You lose sleep watching the Binibining Lungsod ng Batangas (Miss Batangas) Beauty Pageant at the People’s Quadrangle to see who it is among the girls you know around town has suddenly bloomed to be beauty queen material.

        And on the day of the fiesta itself, you are roused from your sleep by the sound of drums and xylophones from the marching band parading around the city. That is, if you aren’t required to wake up early to join the parade with the majorettes or your co-workers to represent the establishment you work for. It is a long parade participated by all sectors of society. Some participants are dressed in native garb (baro’t saya), marching, or doing the local subli dance with bamboo castanets on their hands. The winners of the pageant don beautiful gowns and sit on floats adorned with flowers and crepe paper. It is no Rose Bowl parade, but beautiful, unique and rich with substance indeed. We also see the ati-atihan, children wearing loin cloths, sacks and straws, their skin blackened all over with charcoal, as they chant their way down the street to a very primal beat that makes you bob your head to the rhythm as beads of sweat trickle down your forehead in the sweltering mid-day heat.

       Family, relatives and friends settled or working in Metro Manila and other cities manage to find their way back home amidst the heavy traffic. But the best part of it all? The fiesta food! Everyone has an open house around the city. You are invited to your friends’ homes, still decked with Christmas cheer, as they are to yours. I remember moving from one house to another eating everyone’s own version of the afritada, caldreta, menudo, puto and dinuguan (pork blood), kilawing taghilaw, embutido (meatloaf), macaroni or potato salad, fruit salad, biko (rice cake) and leche flan. It is a city-wide food trip that everyone from all walks of life is welcome to partake. And no one minds growing a dress size bigger from the feasting and all.

        The fiesta culminates with a mass and a procession of the Sto. Nino from the Immaculate Conception Church. My dad is lucky to be one of the so-called Guardians of the Sto. Nino, a group of men in charge of taking care of the image and following the float in the procession. In my own way, I am lucky too. I grew up as a full-blooded Batanguena witnessing it all. The beautiful culture, the creativity, warmth and hospitality of the people, the devotion and spirituality, the tradition…everything that makes our people proud is brought out altogether by the town fiesta. The memories are etched in my heart forever.

        One day, I will come back home to experience it all over again.  Be with me.

In Memoriam

It's true what they say...Grief comes in waves...I fell asleep last night, thinking about you, my baby boy...remembering your first kicks inside my tummy and your very cute sonogram image when we found out you were a boy.  So I'm posting this poem from your memorial service prayer card.  Just a little thing I can do to make mommy feel better:

In Loving Memory

Cody Francis

November 18, 2006

 

Escorted in such splendor

   If you could only see

The beauty and the majesty

   As angels carried me.

Far beyond the life I knew

   Secure in their embrace

My journey was a prelude

   To the glory of this place.

Welcomed by rejoicing

   No tears are ever found.

God Himself wipes them away

   And angel's songs abound.

Eternal gates were opened

   Peace met me there inside

I rejoice now with the angels

   In Heaven I abide.

TGIF

Thank God It's....Friendster!!!   LOL

        It's 1:00 am, I just finished looking at my friends' profiles (with a snoring symphony in the background...Aldred in Wonderland!).  I spent, or rather, wasted about 2 hours online just lurking around in Friendster when I'm supposed to be surfing for a job.

        Friendster.  Sometimes I tend to think...what's up with the world these days? People write instead of make phone calls.  We visit profiles instead of personally checking to see what's up with someone. And when taken to the extreme, some people slip into catatonia staring at the screen 24/7 and become fully-pledged anti-socials (aren't these friendship network sites supposed to be for socializing to begin with???) I have become a wee bit cynical about this whole thing myself -- not until tonight. I'm miles away from some people I treasure the most.  And I'm also decades away from my past (where at some point I have met and shared good memories with some folks I have recently been reunited with in Friendster).  I realized, Friendster has made the world smaller for me. 

        So, because of Friendster, I feel close to my friends and family back home despite the distance. I am not very "skilled" at keeping in touch with each one regularly (busy...or lazy, you decide).  Nonetheless, I still feel like I'm there, witnessing every important moment and learning about each new thing that is going on.  Seeing couples getting married, babies being born, kids getting taller, people celebrating birthdays, friends travelling far and wide........

        Perhaps that's why I go into Friendster a lot.  I am visible and active in this virtual world, blogging and posting pictures, so that you, my dear friends (those who made it to my circle of trust) and those of you, welcome bystanders (who care enough to bother looking at my posts) can likewise witness what's going on in my life even if I'm continents away -- no stalkers though, please! *LOL*  This is my own little way --most of the time, the best I can do-- of keeping in touch.  Caring is a two-way thing.  I realize we shouldn't just say "how are you?"...we might also want to share what's going on in our life to those who care about us.  After all, don't we bother to find out what's going on with those we love in order to receive some kind of peace in our hearts?

        So, if used for the right purpose and intention, maybe Friendster isn't really a waste of time after all.  Tonight, I saw my friends and family smiling in their pictures, even those I don't actually write or talk to.  I got a glimpse of their lives and saw how God is blessing them in many different ways. Thank you, Lord, for each one.

        *YAWN*

        I can now sleep with peace in my heart.  Til my next post...Goodnight!

Happy New Year!!!

Just wanna share my favorite song as I ring in 2007...HAVE A GREAT YEAR, EVERYONE!!!     I'd Like To Teach the World To Sing    
(In Perfect Harmony)
The New Seekers

I'd like to build the world a home And furnish it with love Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves I'd like to teach the world to sing In perfect harmony I'd like to hold it in my arms and keep it company I'd like to see the world for once All standing hand in hand And hear them echo through the hills "Ah, peace throughout the land" (That's the song I hear) I'd like to teach the world to sing (that the world sings today) In perfect harmony (Lead singer and background singers singing simultaneously) I'd like to teach the world to sing In perfect harmony Id like to build the world a home And furnish it with love Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves Click here to listen